Category Archives: Weblogs

Dreams of Spanking: Congratulations Pandora, Haron and Zille

dreams-of-spanking1Hello and happy holidays.  It’s been a busy year for lots of reasons and sadly this blog has suffered neglect.  2012 will be better, I promise, but I’m thankful that you still come and see us.  All of us have experienced a lot of changes over the seven years the PB has been up.  Some we’ve shared here, others we haven’t. But we’ve never stopped caring about TTWD, each other or the many wonderful men and women who read here and care about the topic.
dreams-of-spanking2But enough about that, on to the reason for this blog post. Over the past two years I’ve been following Pandora Blake’s quest to create a spanking film and photo site quite closely.  Today that site, Dreams of Spanking, went live. There’s lots of wonderful content and I like it for reasons I discuss on my blog, but my main reason for mentioning it here is that two of the Punishment Book’s writers, Zille (in Caned in Jodhpurs) and Haron AKA Adele Haze (topping her lovely partner Jimmy in Her Ladyship’s Breakfast) have filmed and worked on the site. I’ve put a couple of my favorite stills (with permission) up, but you should go and look at the site.

But most of all, congratulations to Pandora, Haron and Zille.  I’ve always known you dream of spanking, but it’s wonderful to get to see what those dreams are.

H8 – Keep ‘Em Out of Sight

h8[I wrote this for my blog but I’m reposting it here because the discrimination against M/M spanking in the spanking scene is a total kink in my kink as Natty would say.  It makes me feel bad about myself and being part of this scene.  It’s a face of homophobia, something I don’t tolerate in any part of my life and I’m done tolerating in the spanking scene.  Be warned.]

As many of you know, I’m not exactly white. I’m Mexican American or as I prefer to call myself, Chicana. My father and my grandparents were born here in Los Angeles, but my great-grandparents came up from Zacatecas, Mexico.  I grew up in Los Angeles where having a white mother didn’t make me anything but Mexican.  That said, I didn’t experience too much discrimination.  My parents were very careful, protecting my sister, brother and me from the hate and fear that my father’s face and skin color could evoke.  Still, up through the 1980s, they had a hard time moving into white neighborhoods.  Realtors refused to show them homes, tried to steer them to the browner parts of town.  And this was with my mother being white.

My uncle’s family experienced all that and much more. My cousins don’t have a white mother to temper their skin tone and that color’s effect on the neighborhood.  When they moved into a white part of town, a “welcome wagon” met them with a chicken casserole and a request that they keep their children in the backyard for fear the sight of these brown children would lower property values.

So what you say?  Sad, but these are different times, right?

I say wrong and I’m calling our spanking community out on it. What groups like Crimson Moon and Ms. Margaret’s SCONY are doing by not allowing M/M spanking in their groups, what SpankingTube is doing by not having M/M searches come up in their general search is the same damn thing as racial redlining was in a previous generation.  It maybe legally right, but it’s ethically reprehensible.

But, but, some people don’t like M/M spanking.  So what?  I don’t like oral sex.  I don’t ask that it be banned or shunted off into a corner so I don’t have to stumble upon it.  I just avert my gaze and look at something I do like.  For those of you who think you can’t learn to stomach M/M spanking, I urge you to free your mind and grow the fuck up.   If your arousal is so fragile that the sight or suggestion of M/M spanking can take it down, you may need some medical help.  Not everything in the scene has to exist specifically to get you off.

But, but, you agree with me.  Really. You wish these spanking groups or SpankingTube didn’t discriminate.  Then live your beliefs.  Don’t patronize them.   Don’t use their sites.  Don’t go to their parties.  And let them know why you’re not.  That you’d like to, but because of their policy toward M/M spanking in our scene, you can’t.  Then go places like Shadow Lane and SF-CP that are open to everyone whatever their orientation.

But, but, Mija, you’re ranting.

Yes. Yes I am.  Don’t hate. You know you don’t want to.  And don’t support people who can and do.

ADDED: For more information on what SpankingTube is doing and why it sucks see this post by PaulThe Problem with SpankingTube.com

For a less rant-y take on M/M spanking see this post by IndyHomophobia in the Scene.

 

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PS. What did my uncle do? He had his twin brother move in next door with his family.  And then two put up a basketball hoop so all the kids played outside in the street, property values be damned.

PB 2010 Closing Days — Opening Lines


calendar[I got the idea for this blog post from padme’s blog (and she got it from viemoira’s who got it from — well you get the idea –) and it seemed like a fun idea. I did it first on my own blog and liked it so much I decided we should have one here too. This blog entry is constructed by taking the opening sentence or two from the first blog post of each month.]

We missed Love Our Lurkers this year, but I though the PB could offer a Thank You to our readers and also play along with this way to close the blog for 2010 and ring in 2011.  I didn’t note who wrote what because, well that’s not the point and it’s on the posts anyway.  Thanks for being with us in 2010 — I’m looking forward to where 2011 takes us.

January: I’ve had this plan for a while now to write about topics other than specific punishments. There are a lot of things that float around in my head and some day I will have some spare time and be able to actually sit down and write about some of them.

February: Parenting kids in a kinky household really is different. I suppose everyone experiences parenthood differently, but I think kinksters definitely have unique challenges.

March:  Last week (at least it was last week when I started this post) I read Jessica Wakeman’s piece over at The Frisky about her first D/s relationship and was going to write about the similarities/differences with my own first spanking relationship.

April: I’ve been organizing the books in our apartment, as they are threatening to take over the place, and I found this gem among Papa Otter’s erotica collection.

May: Crashing has a way of putting me in a very Natty mood. And last Wednesday, after a long Mother’s Day, a longer ME/CFS Awareness Day, and a trip to the acupuncturist, I crashed.

June: Dear Readers, Please be patient with me as I hash out one of the age old questions of kinky people: What is the purpose of punishment? I am sure you’ve all seen articles and opinion pieces about this before, but I’m not asking it in general. I’m asking it for myself. Why do Master and I include punishment in our relationship?

July: PB was off this month.  How shameful!

August: This is the first time I’ve written about this at the time rather than after a restart, maybe because the reason doesn’t seem quite as personal as has sometimes been the case.  We’re not doing punishment right now.

September: I am only recently starting to get back my spanking mojo after an extended hiatus for pregnancy- and postpartum-related issues.

October: Chris (of sparkle and Chris) and I have been having a conversation lately about what he as a top gets out of the punishment dynamic.  We thought it made for an interesting post, since we talk a lot about what the bottom gets out of a discipline/punishment arrangement, but we don’t hear about the other side very often (or if we do, it’s from an unrealistic Tops Are Superior Creatures perspective).

November: Today I was thinking about my first time. I guess for most people (read: Vanillas) the “first time” means when they lost their virginity. I could tell you that story but it’s boring and sad.

December: In discipline or punishment terms, I always choose the not-spanking option.

Ring out the old year, ring in the new!  And if you decide to blog your year’s opening lines, let us know!

 

 

Vote For Our Zille! 2010 Best New Spankee of the Year

zilleThe lovely blogger and model Zille Defeu (one of the charming and witty PB co-authors) has been nominated on the spankingspot.com as the best new spankee of the year.

Though I’m not sure “new” quite describes someone with the range and experience of Zille, I’m thrilled for the chance to recognize her film work and encourage you to click here and vote for Zille (or Zillie as they seem to be calling her).  I mean, look at this picture.  Doesn’t she clearly deserve it? (To win I mean.  What on earth were you thinking?)

Addendum:

Right after I hit send I thought I’d add this.  In addition to her own blog writing and modeling, Zille has done a lot in the spanking scene this year.  I don’t follow her every move (much as that might be great fun) but I’ve seen her organize the CF-CP spanking party up in San Francisco (and epic fun night) and know she’s worked as a volunteer judge for this year’s SSC contest.  She’s also attended Shadow Lane as well as UK hosted parties.  She and her partner were a great help at helping run errands for the Northern Spanking suite party at Shadow Lane.

What’s my point?  Vote for Zille not because she’s got a pretty face.  Vote for her because, in best sense of the term, she’s a good all-rounder and gives back to our scene and community.  What more can anyone ask of anyone, spankee or not?

 

SCAM Artist Alert OR I Feel So Dirty!

A year or so ago "Katie Spades" wrote to the Punishment Book authors telling us how much she liked the PB (including some dreck on us having "inspired" her and her partner) and asked us to link to her as she was starting a career as a spanking model.

Now we never do the "I’ll link to you if you link to me" thing but a couple of PB writers liked the blog and said they were following it (that’s always our criteria).  So a link to her blog went onto our sidebar (no  need to check, it’s gone).

Today one of the other authors sent me this link from the A.S.S. blog.

Apparently Katie’s been scamming us all.

(Katie: from the quoted beer.com podcast)
Here was the deal, like I wanted to make money. And to get a name for myself, but I wasn’t quite sure how to do it, and I didn’t want to go like straight up porn. So I looked around… and I saw the, well it’s like this little community, the spanking industry… and for the most part… I mean there are a couple of pretty models… but for the most part there aren’t many. So I looked at it as like okay, here is an easy way jump to the top of an industry like that, because I can totally take it over with the way I look. So I decided to do that.

I haven’t actually listened to the whole podcast yet –I’m at work– but I’ve heard enough.   A friend had pointed me to her "SAVE KATIE" campaign which was raising money to supposedly off-set expenses brought on by an "illness." The interview doesn’t seem to mention that, but there’s no reason to think that’s true either.

As my grandfather would have said, what a piece of work! My sympathies especially go out to the kindhearted folks who were taken in by her "SAVE KATIE" scam to get money out of the community for help during her  supposed "illness."

Feh!

PS: Sending even more love out to the real models in our scene. You’re 100X more fun to watch anyway.

We’re *First*?

Today when I was checking our stats (yeah, I do it a lot, especially when bored at work), I realized that the PB makes Google's first or second page for the entry "punishment."  Cool, right?

Yeah, guess where we are on the page when if you Google "punished wife"?  Ouch!

Caned wife? Page 5.

Punishment Book?  First entry, page 1.

And yes, these are generating a number of hits*, thanks for asking.

(*and no, that wasn't an intentional pun.  Double ouch!)

Telling Truths & Telling Tales

I feel odd writing this because it’s something I want to discuss (hence
the whole writing thing) and yet don’t want to be pointing fingers or
telling tales at someone else’s expense.

So here’s my attempt to have it both ways.

In the past couple weeks it’s come to light that a popular blogger who
wrote about spanking, her marriage and domestic discipline / punishment
over the past several years has basically been creating an elaborate
fiction.  Though I didn’t read her very often (and therefore the site
wasn’t linked from the Punishment Book) I’m on another list with some
people who were very regular readers and feel upset / betrayed and all
sorts of other negative feelings.

Continue reading

After Spanking

An acquaintance commented recently that while I have frequently described real-life scenes (play or punishment) and have shared them over the years in newsgroups, disguised as fictional writing, with friends and even in chatrooms with other spankos, I don’t generally report or share in written form what happens in the hours after the scene. As my playtime with C is usually overtly sexual, it stands to reason that my scene descriptions would be so, too.

Not necessarily so.

Certainly my scene descriptions often allude to an underlying sexual agenda even if I don’t address it directly. I don’t (couldn’t) deny the arousing aspects of play, or that I find certain types of kink extremely … err … exciting. I also can’t deny that spanking, in and of itself, is both stimulating and painful.

I have several reasons for creating a proverbial ‘line in the sand’ while relating scenes for public consumption, whether for play or punishment.

Continue reading