Monthly Archives: November 2007

Helping your neighbours

I’m not usually big on practical jokes, because I like people around me
to feel good. I’m empathic like that. However, I’m not completely above
occasional little naughtiness when events call for it.

This time, it felt like the events were *begging* for it. Abel and I
were showing our friend Sarah around our town when we encountered one
of these charity fund-raisers with a bucket: you throw some coins in
there, and the guy gives you a sticker to say what a big damn hero you
are for giving money away.

So. Abel tosses some coins into the bucket and receives the sticker.
Now, if you happen to have a child with you, stickers are great.
Otherwise? Not so great. Grown-up clothes don’t look so good
accessorised with stickers, plus there’s icky glue on them. Plus, it’s
uncool to advertise your charitable donations – particularly, with a
big piece of paper stuck to your boob. Therefore, I felt I was
justified in rolling my eyes a little when Abel slapped the sticker
onto the outside of my coat. "Keep it there," he said sternly.

It felt like he was putting me through a character-building exercise.

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How my sister’s dog saved my ass

Tuesday night I was dogsitting for my sister for a few hours when A. called for our daily chat. And in the course of our chat I had to confess that I had gone to bed 40 minutes late. Which was bad, but especially naughty as I had gone to bed that late the night before and gotten off with a warning.

"I think your sister’s dog is going to witness a little domestic discipline," A. said. "Better fetch the ping pong paddle." (Which I was surprised he was even bothering with as he said the day before he can never take it seriously as an implement.)

"But," I whined. "I can’t do this in front of the dog. She’s looking at me."

And she was too. A tan, medium-sized, short-haired dog with big floppy ears sprawled out at the end of the bed who raised her head up and turned it toward me with big dark chocolate eyes.

"Bare bottom, please."

I pouted and pulled down my leggings and underwear. And felt weird
as hell as the dog stared at me while I laid down on the bed, paddle in
hand.

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