Locks, Keys and Chaos

I left the front door unlocked twice last week.

Chris has a habit of asking, on his way out the door, if I’ll lock it behind him so he doesn’t have to pause and do it himself. Now, to be fair, he usually has his hands full or is in a ‘9-1-1’ rush, and he always asks and doesn’t tell, but I generally feel obliged to say yes.

Sometimes, however, ‘right now’ isn’t convenient. I’m in the bathroom with the baby, getting dressed, feel lazy, have something on a hot stove, am in the middle of Civ IV, trying to change a diaper, etc. So I’ll answer with perfectly good intentions, “I will in a few minutes.” And generally I do.

In addition, the princess and I leave the house through the garage generally (where my car is), so we don’t use that same door when we leave.  And, as unbelievable as it may be, when it’s time to leave, it’s time to leave. The princess isn’t patient. Each thirty-five wiggling pound wants to be carried at the same time as the diaper backpack, Mama’s purse, the mail for the post office, her favorite toy, her juice cup, and every other item that needs to leave the house.

It’s all I can do to either have a verbal dialogue with her as I convince her to walk the thirty feet from the kitchen to the garage, or to struggle along like a 5-year-old staggering as he carries a chimpanzee. Checking all four (yes, four) doors that lead out of the house is not on the agenda, and won’t be. Chris prefers that they be locked all the time, anyway, when we’re not outside, and rightly so. Besides the security issues, the princess is about ready to be able to open them herself (one she already can, to the backyard), and we don’t want her leaving the house unsupervised for a variety of neighborhood and backyard reasons.

(Yes, I realize I can’t justify something that isn’t justifiable.  I’m just explaining…)

Anyway, I forgot twice last week. Honestly, I don’t remember the first time, but Chris came home after I had left the house and the front door was unlocked. Then, again, on Sunday morning, he left in a 9-1-1 rush while I was dressing in the bedroom. He asked if I could lock the door. I said, “After I’m dressed!” and had perfectly good intentions of doing so.

Except I didn’t.  The princess, the enthusiastic angel dog, and any number of other immediate demands on my time intruded and I simply forgot.  And then twenty minutes had passed and I was the 5-year old with the squirming chimpanzee trying to get everything in the car, and we left.

So Chris came home to an empty, unlocked house.

(Another justification I feel obliged to put forth:  We live in a relatively safe neighborhood.  Nowhere is crime-less, I know, but the people on our street our fairly observant, and this is not a neighborhood that empties out during the day.  There are always people around.  To be frank, it’s more likely one of the neighbors would try the front door than a stranger.  And the dog would probably terrorize anyone who tried, anyway.  She’s a combination doorbell, security alarm and warning system.  She even barks at Chris and I occasionally if she sees us coming before she recognizes us.)

Very wisely, he said nothing to me when we first saw each other at church later.  But after we got home, he said, “You’re getting a spanking later.”

“Why?” I asked, still having no idea I had forgotten to lock the door.

“Because you didn’t lock the door when I left this morning.”

And then I remembered.  Eep.  “Should I be worried?”

(This question is sparkle-speak that can be translated as, “Are you really mad at me or is it that you’re just being sweet and strict?”  Fortunately, Chris is fluent in sparkle-speak.)

“Not too much,” he answered, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

Now, my strange propensities for leaving doors unlocked or keys in the locks have been noted before (mostly before the advent of Punishment Book).  My excuse then was that pregnant women were distracted by natural design (really, even the doctor warned me about it) and I shouldn’t be spanked for it.  (Of course I was, anyway, in a second-trimester gentle kind of way.)  I don’t have that excuse now.

So there I was, eight hours later (when the princess finally couldn’t fight off sleep anymore), with my panties around my thighs and a very hard hand smacking my bottom.  Harder than usual, particularly at the beginning.  I hate to complain, but I really do like a gentle warm-up first, and there was absolutely none.  Just hard hand spanking.  After he was finished smacking and I was finished yelping, he said, “We’ve talked about this before, you know.”

I know.  I know. Of course, I don’t say this out loud.

“But you haven’t done it in awhile.”

I nodded. Dutifully. I didn’t think I had.  “So this was a warning?”

“Discipline,” he answered.  (Hmmm…. Note to self, perhaps it’s time to muse on my personal definitions of punishment and discipline and maintenance and see if they are in line with his again.)  Then he said, “If you do it again, I’m going to paddle you.”


12 thoughts on “Locks, Keys and Chaos

  1. ROB

    on excuses if you had done it before the punishment was no tsevere enough he should have paddled youas well as spanked you

  2. Anonymous

    Ouch! Sorry Sparkle.
    I know what it is like to leave the house with a toddler and all their “gear” so I can see how it happened. I tend to forget to turn the alarm on and it drives E crazy. I just don’t have enough arms to do it all and get out the door in time.

  3. Fireman Chris

    Given the nature of the infraction and the length of time since the last, I’m pretty sure the severity was just right. After all, that’s why I chose it as the appropriate punishment.

  4. Tigger

    Sorry, Sparkle but you got what you needed… as I’ve recently learned for the very first time (truly learned), sometimes we need to be reminded that the choice isn’t ours and our man really does know better than us exactly what we need. It’s never too much or too little when viewed that way… though it sure feels like it at the time.
    Bravo, Chris… great job!
    Hugs to you both,

  5. Iris

    “Fortunately, Chris is fluent in sparkle-speak.”
    😀 This made me smile out loud. Glad to hear you’re both speaking the same language.
    And maybe you can make locking the doors into a game with the princess: “Let’s go lock *this* door!” That way you won’t forget and she’ll start thinking that doors are for locking, not for exiting unsupervised.
    Or not. 😉
    Big hugs,

  6. Anonymous

    To be honest… should your husband be locking the door himself? If he’s a ” big enough” boy to be in charge of diciplining you… he should have enough dicipline himself to turn around and lock the door.
    It’s not very fair for you to be punished for taking care or your baby. He would rather you leave her in the car while you check around?
    Honestly… he should lock it himself.

  7. sparkle

    The issue was that I said I would lock it, and then didn’t. Perhaps this wasn’t clear. Just as it’s not always convenient for me to check the locks, it’s not always practical for Chris to lock the door behind him either, particularly when it’s a fire department emergency and he’s trying to juggle radios, shoes, turn-outs, water bottles, two sets of keys and whatever else he needs. (If it sounds like I’m defending him, that’s because I am.)
    The punishment *was* deserved, to be quite frank. I never meant to suggest it wasn’t fair or deserved (only that my instinct is to rationalize). A harsher punishment would not have been out of line, either, but I am glad Chris did as he did with a warning about not doing it again.

  8. littlepat

    Hi, I have been reading this blog for some time now. I think it’s really interesting how other people practise this DD lifestyle. Since i’ve just started my own blog, I now can post comments! yay! So do come to our blog too.
    Regarding this incident, I think that sometimes our Top/Dom surprised us by giving us a punishment too light. Sometimes I do think that way too, like I deserve more punishment given the severity of the things I have done. However, I must admit that the punishments given really did their job: to prevent me from doing it again. So I must say it’s working well.

  9. Mary

    Sparkle, FYI, I thought you made it perfectly clear that you were asked and agreed to lock the door. I also happen your husband knows you best and others are a bit presumptuous to think they can descide what is too much or too little – you certainly don’t seem to be complaining. I totaly understood your rationalization to be just explaining that although you did not lock the door as promised it isn’t that you are careless or disrespectful – just other aspects of life got in the way. If anyway it kind of justified why maybe a sweet and simple reminder spanking might be exactly the right solution. I know with me that is a good first step to put something a bit closer to the front of my mind and minimizing my forgetfulness in the future.
    Just my 2 cents – after reading the comments to your post.

  10. Anonymous

    I agree with Mary that your original post was perfectly clear. Sorry that you had to come back and defend it. (((Hugs)))

  11. Haron

    Sorry, Sparkle, I’m failing to come up with excuses for you here. (Haron = door locking freak.) All the same, sorry you had to be spanked, and particularly that you had to wait for it for eight hours. Eek! *hugs*

  12. persephone

    i know you posted this a long time ago but i was just scrolling through here and had to read this post! i get in trouble all the time for forgetting to lock the door. i don’t have all the good excuses that you do, but i always rationalize and say that we live in a really nice neighborhood where our house is definitely among the least-impressive, if anyone who was into stealing was lurking about. my rationalizations didn’t get me far, though… i don’t technically have a discipline relationship but i got spanked REALLY hard for that (after two warnings with playful spankings). don’t worry, i learned my lesson.


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