An acquaintance commented recently that while I have frequently described real-life scenes (play or punishment) and have shared them over the years in newsgroups, disguised as fictional writing, with friends and even in chatrooms with other spankos, I don’t generally report or share in written form what happens in the hours after the scene. As my playtime with C is usually overtly sexual, it stands to reason that my scene descriptions would be so, too.
Not necessarily so.
Certainly my scene descriptions often allude to an underlying sexual agenda even if I don’t address it directly. I don’t (couldn’t) deny the arousing aspects of play, or that I find certain types of kink extremely … err … exciting. I also can’t deny that spanking, in and of itself, is both stimulating and painful.
I have several reasons for creating a proverbial ‘line in the sand’ while relating scenes for public consumption, whether for play or punishment.
First, to be frank, relating the explicit details of my own sexual encounters is terribly embarrassing. Now, embarrassment can enhance or augment play and punishment, I know. However, while I might confess the wicked details to one or two close friends and blush brightly, I’m not into public humiliation. Secondly, I instinctively and rabidly insist on protecting what I perceive to be those very private and intimate engagements with my husband. If in sharing that intimacy with others I somehow devalued those moments, I doubt I would ever forgive myself – or ever write anything again. Quite simply, I have an emotional investment in C and I’s relationship that I will protect.
So how *do* I feel following playtime? What does go on?
Sex, usually. If not immediately then later. That’s the physical outcome. The thoroughness of that sexual experience varies and is what I avoid explicitly describing.
The context – the setting – of the event is what generally will determine how I feel following playtime. On one hand, playtime causes an immediate, intense desire for sexual intimacy. On the other hand, (well-deserved) punishment causes an immediate and longer-lasting need for emotional reassurance, often manifested through intimacy. Arousal may be a side effect as well, but that arousal is often a delayed reaction to be enjoyed after any guilt and most of the pain have dissipated.
In other words, if my scene descriptions do not infer that sex immediately followed spanking, that doesn’t mean it didn’t. Or that it did – we might have waited.
* Note: This has been cross-posted to my personal blog, Life in Motion.